Raymond William Stacy Burr, born on May 21, 1917, in New Westminster, British Columbia, Canada, was an iconic figure in Hollywood. His career, which included notable roles in “Perry Mason” and “Ironside,” spanned several decades and earned him significant acclaim. Burr’s dedication to his craft was evident in his demanding work schedule, often enduring 15-hour days on set and spending nights in a bungalow on location.
The immense workload took a toll on his personal life, as Burr himself reflected on the sacrifices he made, stating, “The only thing I regret in my life — I’m sorry I spent nine years of my life tying myself down. I couldn’t be married, have a family, even have friends.”
The Fabricated Marriages and Tragic Stories
Burr’s personal life was shrouded in mystery, primarily due to his fabrications regarding his marriages and family. He claimed to have been married three times, with his first wife allegedly dying in a plane crash and their son succumbing to leukemia. His second marriage reportedly ended in divorce, and his third wife supposedly died of cancer before their honeymoon.
However, these narratives unraveled over time. Isabella Ward, Burr’s second wife, contended that she was his first wife and knew nothing of a prior marriage or a deceased son. This revelation, alongside Burr’s family’s lack of knowledge about these supposed relatives, cast doubt on the authenticity of his claims.
The Hidden Truth: Burr’s Secret Life
As Burr faced terminal kidney cancer in 1993, the truth about his personal life began to emerge. It was revealed that his supposed marriages were a cover for his homosexuality, which he had concealed to safeguard his Hollywood career. Burr’s long-term relationship with Robert Benevides, who had been with him for 35 years, was kept private.
Benevides, who was introduced to Burr by Scotty Bowers, confirmed that their relationship was genuine and disclosed that they had likely married in 1963. Burr and Benevides shared a deep bond, with Benevides often taking on a caretaker role, as noted by a close friend who described Burr in a “frilly pink apron” and performing domestic duties.
Philanthropy and Legacy
Despite the controversies surrounding his personal life, Burr’s legacy includes his substantial philanthropic efforts. He was deeply involved in helping impoverished children from various countries, adopting 27 children and providing financial support for their education and well-being.
Burr’s commitment to these children was genuine, and he maintained correspondence with them, often sending money for their needs and celebrating their achievements. His charitable actions underscored a compassionate side that contributed positively to many lives.
Final Years and Posthumous Revelations
In his final years, Burr and Benevides enjoyed a life together on a vineyard in Sonoma County, California. Following Burr’s death, Benevides inherited his estate, including the vineyard. Despite the public’s initial disappointment upon learning of Burr’s deceptions, his contributions to entertainment and charity remain significant.
Benevides continued to honor Burr’s memory by managing the vineyard and living a life of travel, as he had promised himself. While Burr’s private life was marked by secrecy, his professional accomplishments and philanthropic impact continue to define his legacy.
